Chris

I was born in Ontario and felt I lived a fairly normal life with my parents and 2 brothers. But at the age of 16, my parents were concerned about me and said that I was acting funny. This was when they first spotted that I had schizophrenia but I felt that it was not serious.

After high school we moved to Montreal where I held a variety of jobs which included working in a pharmacy, jewelry store sales, and a department store. Also, for 5 years I worked in the music industry as a backup singer, and soon created my own band where I was a lead singer and we played the top hits. At one time I worked as a mechanics helper. On one day the mechanic accidentaly stepped on the gas and crushed me between the car and garage door. It was a serious accident that required surgery and it took me 2 years to learn to walk again.

Although I held a variety of respectable jobs, I was still affected by my mental illness. While working at the jewelry store, I attempted suicide. It was not so much that I wanted to end my life, but I felt I wanted to go somewhere else. Because of my suicide attempt, I ended up in the psychiatric hospital for several weeks. When they released me, I decided to go to Winnipeg where I lived on the streets for 2 years. While on the streets I met up with a girl and we decided to get back into the music industry. For 3 years we played in a variety of bars. When that came to an end, I decided to move back to Montreal where I lived on the streets for 10 years.

While in Montreal I would go to a church each day for a free meal. One day, a man from the Salvation Army tracked me down. He said that my father had passed away and he left me $90,000. I lived off of that for the next few years. Most of it was spent on beer and wine and I considered myself an alcoholic.

When the money was gone, I decided to move to Vancouver where I lived on the streets again. After about 3 years, I was beaten up badly and ended up in hospital. They would not discharge me to the streets but sent me to a boarding home in Richmond. But that was when my life changed.

On the 2nd day of being in the boarding home, they brought me into Pathways Clubhouse. I felt very uncomfortable and shy, and I have never been in a place where there was a gathering of people with mental illness. For the longest time, I would just sit and listen. I never had more than a few words to say to people. It took me about a year before I started to feel comfortable and would be a bit more talkative. This was new to me because living on the streets I usually kept to myself and didn’t talk unless I had to. Plus on the streets, people really didn’t care what I had to say. But at Pathways Clubhouse, people did care and were interested in me.

I lived in the boarding home for a few years, and then I was asked if I was interested in having my own apartment. I said maybe that would be a good idea, but later on down the road. The Clubhouse staff member said they would put my name on the list. I was quite surprised because a month later the staff member said that there was an opening for me to move out on my own, right away.

I was a bit fearful about having my own place, plus I was very money conscious. But it turned out, because of the subsidy given to me, I had more money left over. I moved out on St. Patricks Day, and the Clubhouse helped me move and get me furniture, something I had not had in years. I no longer live with other people, and have a lot more freedom and independence. It took a little while but now I feel like I was back living a normal life that I used to live. I now cook my own meals, but nothing fancy, listen to music, and read a lot. This has made a big change in my lifestyle. I am now so happy to have my own home.

I was then asked by the Clubhouse staff if I would be interested in working on a Transitional Employment job. It has been years since I had a regular job and was a bit scared to do it. But then the Clubhouse staff said that they train me on the job until I feel comfortable enough to do it on my own. If I am having trouble, I just call them and they will come and help me. And if I am unable to go to work, the staff will work for me so that I don’t lose the job. So I thought I would give it a try. It was a lot easier than I thought, keeps me busy, and now I have more cash. I have had 4 TEP jobs and right now I am working as a janitor. And I am very honoured to have my employer, Henry Beh from Richmond Chinese Community Society here tonight.

Pathways Clubhouse has played a very important role in my life, and in my recovery from mental illness. I have found that life is about learning and through Pathways I have learned so much. I believe there are 2 ways of looking at different lives. One is a road alone; the other is a road where you can get help from others. Some on the road alone could end up wandering, losing their way for a very long time. With the road that can help you, others have been successful before and it’s there with the capability of making your life better. Pathways was my chosen road.

Because of the road I have chosen through Pathway, I am no longer a loner and have many friends. I no longer live on the streets and have my own home. I am no longer broke and have a job. Life is no longer a pointless venture and I want to live a long life.